"wisdom"

Its been quite a while since we last communicate
I know you tried to talk things with me,
but I wasn't myself lately.
I know you are busy as you always are.
Busy with some stuffs,with Living, and busy with your own concerns.
I know I shouldn't disturb you at this time but i cannot longer suppress my emotions.
I need SOMEONE who will listen my words and i know that you could be that SOMEONE.
Wisdom, you see, there are things that I don't understand anymore I'm starting to have these "queer" feelings that i didn't use to have before.


Remember you told me that to love someone includes hurts.
But why didn't you warn me that it would be this painful??
YES, I'd been happy I wont deny.
Everything was just fine  and thought that happiness at last will be mine.
But it was just a lure, trapping me in pain is so terrible.
The one that I loved left me without even telling WHY?
I hope you will feel what i feel---------
and know how to be left alone-------------forever
This is such a PAINFUL WISDOM



Yet i still want to recover... or so I thought
but you pulled me back  to the pit despair
I desperately tried to leave all behind---
But why I always remembering all...
I cant forget those memorable days together...
Why do I still have you on my dreams??
Why do I keep on remembering those memories that i like to erase forever??..
The one to blame is my heart...heart that is being so vulnerable..so sentimental..
Isn't it you who always remind me the pain??
I want a new Life but I always look back to the past
Remembering you did! (DESTROYING ME!)


I still feel terrible wisdom.
I dont even have the strength to pick up the shattered pieces of whats  left in me.
Yes. I'd been happier then,
knowing that I am not just a piece of muscle pumping blood...
But there are times I want to stop beating...
Since every beat is now an AGONY...